Can't Sleep

Been up since 2:30am it is now 4:53am. I hate this. I keep forgetting to buy something like Advil pm. I was thinking about this communication thing these NT's keep harping on about with A.S. people. See I hear a lot "oh your A.S.! But you communicate so well! You don't seem to have a problem to me" Since when are Asperger people not able to communicate? I see many A.S. people communicate very well. It just depends on the people their talking to. It's not about being able to communicate it's about if communicate. I think A.S. people are highly sensitive. And by sensitive I don't mean you insult me I cry. I mean we sense people. Yes like a sixth sense. If I sense that someone maybe unpredictable or insensitive or if I am just not sure of someone I won't outwardly communicate with them. Or for that matter even talk to them at all.

Maybe I am different though I am 42 and have had a life time of dealing with insensitive NT's. If I did not speak up I would get trampled. Even with my husband I have had to learn to speak up and defend my self or get horribly abused. When I was a kid I wouldn't talk to many people. Just those very close to me. I think as we all get older we start to "communicate" more. I see it on the web. I see many Asperger Adults communicating very well through there blogs. My son communicates very well to me and those few he trust. If you make him nervous, forget it! I am the same way. But see after being shoved out in the world by my mother and then dating and eventually marrying a biker, I am more use to many kinds of people. I've been desensitised to a point. So If I would like to or need to say something to someone most of the time I can. But believe me there are people I will just refuse to deal with. Doctors, nasty Vice Principles, rude teachers, obnoxious neighbors, many of my husbands friends many faminly members. I'll take a U turn with them!

I also get treated like an imbecile now that people know I am A.S. My husband especially. Hears a good example. The young man down the street is getting married and his family doesn't have a lot of money so some how It got mentioned that I have a digital camera and I have been doing photography as a hobby for many years. So supposedly the couple asked my husband if I could photograph the wedding. I say supposedly because my husband can be full of bull at times I wouldn't doubt if he volentered me and then overstated my abilities just to make himself look good. He's done it before. But every time I talk about photographing this wedding he keeps say "well she(the bride)will tell you exactly what poses she wants, she will set everything up, you wont have to do anything. And he say it like he's talking to a child. I keep having to tell him I am not an idiot I do have an idea what to do. But he ignores me and rattles on. I can't stand him. I swear to God if she(the bride) talks to me like I am an idiot I will flip!

Is it really us that don't know the "social cues?" Or is it them. The insensitive NT's that think they know it all? It makes me wonder. Who truly has the disability?